Dawn broke, the sun peeking through her sunshades as she hid in her covers.
She didn’t want to wake up. She had dreaded this day, a day she could do nothing about, a day that bore into her soul.
She tore off her beddings, the bright morning light blinding her temporarily. As she went through her morning motions, her mind wound round on what she would say. Or if she would say anything at all, perhaps just listen.
She made herself up.
And then made the call.
“Toooooooooot……Tooooooooooot…” “the number you have dialed is unavailable…you may leave a voice message after the tone…..”
Hi Steve, I just really needed to talk to you. I’ve been going through so much and I really needed you here. Why can’t you just say something? Anyway I had to tell you, work is going well, I am told I am to move to Europe in completion of the research project, but I am not sure I want to go, because of you…..
Her knees slumped, she broke down to a thousand pieces.
An unfinished voice message can do that to you, especially when you are talking to someone with whom you have unfinished business.
There was a loneliness so bold, a pain so steep encroaching within her like a night shadow,so real it had a name. Like a dark sea, it rose with the monsoons. Sometimes, even her loneliness walked away from her. Sometimes it crashed upon her, almost drowning her.
But these weren’t feelings, because those come and go.
Steve had crossed over seven months before; his number still in her phone and she still called him, just to talk to him.
Seven months to this day, he left her. By the end of this day, the number would be deactivated. And she won’t be able to talk to him anymore.
She called again, mumbling in tears…
Love, I just wanted to say, that I love you, you are my being, and I cant walk without you..
I wont be able to call you anymore, but I will come to the beach that you love, I’ll come to church too I’ll go to the animal orphanage and the movies, our seat. Promise me, we’ll keep talking, ok?
She could almost hear him whisper…Yes.